Two of my colleagues asked me (separately) if I had plans for the weekend….The best answer that I could come up with was “I should buy some toilet paper”….

That’s the new slang for I have nothing to do this weekend…

AND….

Obama: Aside From All The Weirdos And Freaks Around Here, The State Of The Union Is Strong

“Americans are known for their strength, perseverance, and, let’s face it, being a little off,” Obama concluded. “It’s in our DNA. It’s what makes us great. Heck, sometimes I turn my music up really loud and just scream at myself in the mirror for an hour. That’s a pretty fucked-up thing. May God bless the United States of America.”